Through out my 22 years of living, I've experienced pain in ways i never thought i would; most of which is. It's easier to tell someone who's really trusted. But to be plain, honest, most of us who pose as "advisers" most of the time. I'm not alone enough to compare my wisdom to that of Solomon's but one thing I do not know what is happening in my life. If we really looked deep down into the souls of every individual causing serious pain to other innocent people, we'd actually find that most of them turned out to be painfully experienced at one point of their lives.
I also learn that there are two ways to deal with pain or hurt. You can either stay comfortable in the dark pit you find yourself in and keep feeling hopeless and empty, you can pick yourself up, dry your tears, get one. Wait! Let's not move so fast! It's one thing to decide to walk through that tunnel. It has never been promised that you can not anywhere.
The thing is whilst you, wallow in pain and hurt and anger, the other person. Let's take this scenario. I stabbed you in the arm and left the knife in there. You, in order to make me realize i hurt you, decide to keep the knife in there or even keep pushing it deeper. I keep ignoring your cries of pain so you decide to keep pushing the knife deeper. At the end of the day, you decide to stop pushing the knife in, you can not go to the hospital. Yes, i stabbed you and i hurt you but you could have avoided the amputation. You could have had the wounded before or by yourself. The whole point is, at the end of the day, i still have my arm and you lost yours just because of you stabbing you.
It's honestly not really easy to let go of pains and pains but once you realize it's really not about the other person's happiness at the end of the day.
I do not know what kind of pain or hurt you are at this point in your life. But honestly there's much more life has to offer you than that. It's not easy as it sounds but LET GO, LET GOD AND EMBRACE HAPPINESS. God loves you so much to see you remain the same negatively.